Ugh....

Ok...I am starting to get a bit frustrated, and Ive realized that even if my best friend is getting married I will ask not to be the maid of honor and possibiliy not even in the wedding. I am not sure what has caused more of a damper on mine and Jamie's friendship, me being pregnant or me being a "crappy" maid of honor. Jamie and I had a little tiff through e-mail a few weeks ago, she felt that I was being a crappy maid of honor because I have stood her up for picking out flowers and her veil and as well the invitations. Well, Jamie has never really made me feel apart of these decisions anyway, she hadnt ever given me more than a few hours notice when she was going to do these things...She doesnt agree with me. I think she forgets that I work nights and she works days. There is a big difference in schedules there. I can not just get up and go do as Jamie pleases anymore. And again tomorrow is no different. I called the lady who is going to alter my dress today, and asked her when I could drop my dress off and I was under the impression that Jamie and I were going on thursday for her final dress fitting...well come to find out the appointment is acutally tuesday at 4:30 pm, but I wouldnt have known that had of not called about my dress. As of now, she still hasnt called to tell me. I am working tonight, and I have to work tomorrow as well. We'll see what time she calls tomorrow or if she just assumes that I know. I know that she has a lot on her mind, this being the week of her wedding, but I as the maid of honor you would think that I would be included in her plans....thats probably too much to ask. Maybe I need to step down as the maid of honor...its not that my heart isnt in it, I truly believe that maybe Jamie doesnt want me to be her maid of honor. The whold other issue of this is that the cost of this wedding is out of control. I spent a fortune on my dress. Jeff's tux is $175 just to rent the damn thing for the night.

As far as the pregnancy, all is going well...15 weeks and counting..I think I felt the baby move last night..but I am not sure...at any rate..I am back to work.....

Update....

Well, it is now the 16th of October. We have officially heard the heartbeat of our baby. Heartbeat was strong at 162. OB says that all is well. We are still waiting to hear from the realtor about the offer we made on a house in La Vista. So hopefully we should hear something by tomorrow afternoon at the latest. It still does not feel real that Jeff and I are going to have a baby. I still dont feel pregnant, so its hard to really believe that there is a growing life inside of me. Maybe once I start to show, it should feel different. I am thinking about possibily telling my brother tomorrow that he is going to be an uncle. I think that he will be very happy, or atleast I hope he will. My sister however, well I am not sure how she is going to react. I hope that she is happy, I also hope that she is not angry with me for not telling her till now. I wanted to make sure that everything was ok until I spilled the beans to everyone. I guess the next step is telling the rest of the extended family. I am not sure how they are going to react. Night for now. More later.